It’s Christmas Day and although I have enjoyed the day with my kids, I feel like a failure tonight. I am in charge of Christmas dinner and nothing is ready and my family is hungry. 😦 The oven is broke (which I should have tended to a long time ago) and things are just not coming together like my mom and mother in law do it. So I sit here and write on my phone in the kitchen (waiting on the oven) so I won’t cry or scream.
Lord, help me in the kitchen. As much as I would like to throw my hands up in air and say I am not cut out for cooking, I know this is not an option. I know You have placed the job of feeding my family in my hands.
I remember these same feelings last Christmas. Why do I do this and what are you showing me Lord? This is the point where I pause and stop writing and try to listen…
When my frustrations and insecurities are drowning out your voice, I pray. God, help me feed my family with joy tonight. I refuse to allow the enemy to seal my joy on such a precious day.
As I prayed this, I find myself thinking of people I know with much greater problems today and things I am thankful for…
I am thankful for these treasured 3 people around my table.
I am thankful for You feeding us tonight.
I am thankful that You gently speak to me in the kitchen.
I am thankful that you care enough about me Jesus, that you don’t leave me in the crazy mess I create in my brain sometimes.
This brings to mind a verse that I have wrote about before, Always be joyful. Keep on praying. No matter what happens always be thankful, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18. Walking this out can be hard but I am learning it is better than the ugly that can surface during frustration.
So the meal was an hour late but it turned out ok. It was not as good as my mom’s or mother in law’s holiday meals but I will continue to lean on Jesus to help me in this area. 🙂
Thank you Jesus for helping me not lose it before Christmas dinner. Maybe my friends, if we turn to Him during our times of insecurities and frustrations, these moments that could turn really ugly will turn into moments we can learn from the One that saves us from the ugly.